His first appearance: This'll probably get me in trouble

Thanatos, born in a barn, and raised by bears, learned to speak and interact with society by watching an old tape of The Shining

	"Yeah, he's alright I guess. He owes me money, though. A lot of money"
	"I try to kick him in the sweetbreads four, maybe five times a day. Minimum"
	"Sometimes I kick him too and blame Sancho"

His first appearance: This'll probably get me in trouble

Duke lost his mouth in a tragic milkshake related accident shortly after his marriage to Natalie

	"It made the honeymoon a little akward"
	"Don't blame the milkshake. A REAL man would be able to please his wife"
	"Real mature, man"

Her first appearance: What the...?

Natalie, ex-animal wrangler, uses her wrangling to keep everyone in line and also taught Thanatos how to balance on a ball with a biscuit on his nose. She is married to Duke and likes to watch shows such as Buffy, Xena: Warrior Princess, Dark Angel, Alias and anything else with as ass-kicking female lead.

	"Nobody knows this, but she likes to walk around the house naked. I've got pictures!"
	"They know NOW you idiot!"
	"Unit Lei likes pictures!"
	"Unit Lei also likes watching grass grow"
	"Unit Lei LIKES watching grass grow!"

His first appearance: Own a pet rock today!

Wang is a 4 foot high, roughly kidney shaped recovering alcoholic rock. Actually he just drinks whenever he wants to, but tells people he's a recovering alcoholic to get them to give him free drinks

	"WHO'RE YOU CALLIN A ROCK YOU GUTTER WHORE!"
	"Wang, did you drink all my turpentine? I was using that"
	"Yeah! Like I turpentined your MOTHER! AHAHA AMIRIGHT"
	"For someone with no intestines, you sure can vomit a lot."

His first appearance: Right in the bojangles!

Although he has two robot wives, Lei and Cleo, Sancho really only has eyes for Cleo. More accurately, he used parts of himself to build Cleo, including one of his eyes. He's madly in lust with her, and she feels the same way...about Thanatos. Luckily for him (and Thanatos), he doesn't appear to know it

	"Know what? What don't I know?"
	"NOTHING! Nothing at all!
	"Her MOTHER! Geddit! Oh man that's priceless. Take a picture"
	"Your bit's over! It's me time now! ME!"
	"I CAN TAKE YOU"
	"Unit Lei and Sancho are made for each other!"
	"YOU WANNA PIECE OF ME TINKERBELL!?"
	"Yes please!"

His first appearance: Jesusmaaaaaan, Jesusmaaaaaaaan

Jesusman is the Son of God(tm), and the patron saint of kicking evil's ass. Working out of the Jesuscave, Jesusman is far too busy kicking ass, whoopin' ass, and doing various other ass related activites to appear with the rest of the gang too often.

	"Once I scraped my knee and Jesus blew on it and made it better. And he gave me a lollipop"
	"He didn't give ME a lollipop! He gave me a punch in the face!"
	"You pushed me!"
	"Haha yeah"

His first appearance: Jesusmaaaaaan, Jesusmaaaaaaaan

Violent Bob is a compatriot of Thanatos. As his name suggests, he is rather violent. He is fiercely competitive and once headbutted a car to death.

	"That car thing's a lie. It was more like a motorcycle. Or a moped, really"
	"I was there, man. It was a car. A HUMMER! That's like the Superman of cars."
	"You were drunk! And headbutting the moped too!"
	"I was legally dead for three minutes!"

His first appearance: For the ladies

Woodrow, alpha male, is Thanatos' lawyer and also filthy stinking rich. The two may possibly be connected. He's also skilled at Engineering, Quantum Physics and Rugby, because American Rules Football is for wimps. He also walks around in a thong and red bow tie. Only.

	"He's ripped, and a total he-babe. I'd do him in a second"
	"I'm RIGHT. HERE."
	"Well pay attention then. You might learn something"
	"Damn Woodrow."

Her first appearance: Gratuitous!

Due to her rather bumbling parents, Katrina's legal name is actually Gregory Peck, even though it is pronounced Katrina Mikalia. She likes to spend her days hiding under her bed.

	"I don't LIKE it! It's that crazy robot! She's trying to kill me!"
	"My Cleo would never do that. She's pure as a snowflake"
	"A sex snowflake!"
	"Not Cleo! LEI! She strangles me!"
	"What? LEI? She's harmless. Aren't you, Lei?"
	"Unit Lei hates Katrina but likes kittens!"
	"See Kat? Kat?"
	*GLK*

Her first appearance: She's so cute

A Made in China knock-off from the popular Japanese anime 'Metal Whip Queen Animal', Lei is as cute as a button and as durable as a paper towel. She is madly in love with Sancho, after being told that she should be, but Sancho is completely oblivious to her.

	"Unit Lei likes paper tow--"
	"WE GET IT. You like things! Gimme that damn booze, Wang"
	"FUGOFF! Get yer own!"
	"That IS my own! You stole it!"
	"Why isn't anyone helping me!?"

Her first appearance: Please don't sue me, Fox

Built by Sancho out of his own parts, Cleo is Sancho's favourite out of the two robo-brides, but due to his errors while constructing her, she would rather "be friends". Sancho programmed her using Weird Science as a guide, as he was unable to find any other handy guides on building 'the perfect woman'. This unfortunately led to Cleo's psyche being firmly rooted in the mid-eighties. She is love-imprinted on Thanatos like that kid from A.I., only with sex.

	"Cleo weighs a tonne. I'm not kidding. We took her to one of those truck weigh-in stations and she weighs a tonne. So it's not too much fun when she gets in one of her "moods". Which is ALL THE TIME! Oh JESUS! Here she comes!"
	"Come here, love designate Thanatos"
	"Oh god! My balls!"
	"Mmm"
	"HEY! She's MINE! I own her!"
	"Oh GOD!! MY BALLS!!"